When I was a kid, my dad read to us from the long time classic “The Pilgrim’s Progress” by John Bunyan. My dad has always been a master storyteller- his life has been chock-full of story worthy events that I just can’t believe all happened to him. Like the time he narrowly escaped death while trapped in a tree above an all-out gang fight in Phoenix- or the time he was dragged underneath the belly of a horse- or the outhouse his family of 10 used and their creative alternatives to toilet paper- crazy stuff!

 I can’t believe all the stuff he has lived through…

So as my dad would share this book with us, he had lived through many, many of his own adventures that gave even more credence to this fictional tale he read of shall we say, “spiritual journeying” in a nutshell. And in reflecting on that story, I realize something now…

As a kid, I didn’t understand that the book was an analogy for the Christian life. I only knew that my dad was very sincere about conveying this story to us. But now as an adult, I can see clearer the purpose of the “Pilgrim’s Progress” how God leads in each of our individual lives.

When we are going through a hardship or tough season, we ususally don’t understand why it’s happening at the time. Just like when I was a child- I had no idea what the pilgrim’s journey was about at the time. But I know very well now, that it was a tale to guide us in understanding that God has something to teach us through every part of our lives… A path that begs to teach us wisdom in every circumstance, because we have a God who longs to be near and dear to us, to gently guide us and help us seek His ways in a world that seeks to destroy. And as we travel on our own life path, none of our journeys look the same.

They’re not supposed to.

Though we are tempted to compare ourselves and “measure up” in this way or that, there is NO way that any life can duplicate another. I can’t live the life the way my dad did, and learn lessons in the way he had to. That was God’s plan for my dad, not me. And so, I find great freedom in recognizing that God works with us all differently. He gifted you and I in unique ways that don’t look like anyone else. And how beautiful that they’re not supposed to!

It took me many years of heartache to finally learn this lesson (and I will probably keep learning this lesson)…

Case in point, I used to spend regular nights out for coffee with some wonderful women who I aspired to emulate as a wife and mom. It was during the season when I really needed to get out because having infant twins kept my cooped up at home quite a bit!

At that time, I thought I needed to look just like these women in my own life-they seemed like they were getting everything “right”. But in judging myself against them, I only became toxic to my own self. For nearly two years I believed the lie that I did not measure up- I told myself that I wasn’t as kind or wise as they were, my marriage wasn’t as strong as theirs, my kids weren’t as….

Well, you get the picture. I pretty much viewed myself and our family as “damaged goods”. I couldn’t recognize that I was A: in a totally different season from those women, and B: That my perspective was creating a standard that I would never reach.

I was simply setting myself up for defeat every time I returned home from those coffee nights.

It was much later that I learned that this was not God’s plan- He did not want me to view myself, or my family in this way-

God wants each of us to be the best at being ourselves- not someone else.

The truth is He created us, and never wants us to second guess our worth to Him. To judge ourselves and our families against others is a cycle that can only cause damage. God wants each of us to be the best at being ourselves- not someone else.

So I now see my family, and my life, and I know that God crafted me to be the exact wife for Don and the exact mom for Sam, Emmy, and Allie. And the same goes for each of you in your homes. Life in our family is about continual growth along the way, never perfect, but given to each other, to learn, grow, build up and refine one another.

So now, there is such a sweetness in looking at my family and recognizing that the Lord meant for us to be here together. What a joy I was missing, in that ugly season of comparison. BUT I am sooooo grateful as I look at my journey now.

Friends, we will never have the perfect life, or be the perfect person or have perfect relationships- that’s why we have Jesus! He is the perfect sacrifice that we could never be, He is the model of love that we will never fulfill 100%. So He doesn’t ask us for perfection- He asks that we follow and learn from Him- to reach out in confession and simply receive that sweet forgiveness- the clean slate.

We tell ourselves that perfection is the standard- not Him. He knows nothing will change about human nature…He’s seen it for the entire history of mankind!

So I challenge you today- take note of the journey you are on- notice how God is drawing you near in this current circumstance. He aims to use your valleys, your peaks, your dry seasons, your times of isolation all for His good. He promises He is with you, no matter what boulders or steep cliffs lie on your path.

I pray that you will discover freedom in the person He made you to be, fellow pilgrims. Take comfort in knowing that He gifted you in a specific way for your particular journey, in your particular family and He already made you able for the path ahead. Here is His encouraging word for you:

10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. -Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)

You are His masterpieces, pilgrims- take heart, He is with you on the journey.

~Sarah Bourne
Early Childhood Director